Postnatal anxiety, depression & ADHD - Renee's story

I grew up in a family marked by intergenerational trauma and mental illness. 

From a young age I was quiet, anxious, sensitive, and I struggled with confidence, attention, and learning at school. Years of bullying and emotional instability at home left me feeling inadequate long before I understood why. 

Despite these challenges, I pursued my long-held dream of becoming a Nurse, Midwife and Maternal and Child Health Nurse. I built a career caring for families while quietly battling my own mental health issues. 

Anxiety and depressive episodes followed me through my early adulthood and intensified during major transitions — university, early career experiences, and starting a family.

Motherhood brought immense love, but also significant strain. 

Across two of my pregnancies, I experienced depression, postnatal depression, and significant anxiety. My third pregnancy, I also suffered from hyperemesis gravidarum and was pregnant during the COVID-19 pandemic. Daily suicidal ideation and overwhelming hopelessness consumed me. I fought constantly against thoughts that I was a burden, that my family deserved better, and that nothing would ever improve. 

Yet somewhere within me was still a spark that chose to ask for help repeatedly. I frequently sought support from my GP, psychologist from Mums Matter Psychology, Psychiatrist, PANDA phone line, and crisis services. Across 2021–2022 I experienced several mental health crises and required admission to both a mother-Baby Unit and an adult psychiatric hospital. 

Despite years of treatment, medication changes, and therapy, my symptoms remained difficult to manage.

The moment that changed everything 

At the same time, my eldest child was showing signs of neurodivergence. After years of advocacy, he was diagnosed with ADHD at eight years old.

What no one recognised at the time — including myself — was that many of the challenges I had faced throughout my life mirrored his. In March 2023, a clinician finally suggested that I may also have ADHD. I received my diagnosis in May 2023, at 34 years old. That moment changed everything.

For the first time, the pattern of my life made sense: my emotional dysregulation, chronic overwhelm, forgetfulness, learning difficulties, masking, perfectionism, burnout, and the years of being misdiagnosed with mood disorders. Even my intrusive thoughts faded after receiving appropriate treatment and understanding. 

My ADHD diagnosis reframed decades of self-blame into self-understanding. It revealed why traditional treatments had offered only partial relief, and why life had always felt harder than it should have been.

Using my lived experience to drive change 

Today, I combine my professional background as an RN/RM/MCH Nurse with my lived and living experience of ADHD, mental illness, and parenting neurodivergent children. I am passionate about delivering neuroinclusive care and advocate to help reduce stigma, improve early identification, and promote understanding of neurodivergence — especially in women and children.

Lived experience storytelling drives empathy and systems change.

This is my story, and I hope it helps others feel seen, supported, and less alone.